Every season of Love is Blind is slightly different. Some seasons, the contestants feel a little less like they’re actually there for love and more like they want more followers on Instagram. Other seasons, everyone seems so enthusiastic and genuine that I’m actually shocked when they turn each other down at the altar.
But Love is Blind Season 10? Well, this is the season that really hammers home just how much work women put into a relationship — even one separated by a hypnotic glowing wall.
Look, the season just started, so of course we can’t jump too far ahead. But in the six episodes that have dropped, there’s a giant theme of smart, capable, bad*ss Ohio women who know their worth still having to plod the men along and be the person who knows how to actually handle a relationship.
It’s giving major ick.
These women are leading the charge on everything, from encouraging the men to be vulnerable and speak from the heart (and then thanking them for it) to literally breaking up with themselves because some of the men can’t handle doing it themselves and would rather waffle back and forth.
Oh yes. Emotional labor apparently starts before a relationship even forms.
And it’s clear that the women on Love is Blind Season 10 are well aware of their worth. Not only are most of the contestants this season in their 30s (a nice change from the early 20s contestants of previous seasons who acted as if they were going to be single all of their life unless they got married right now), but these women aren’t lacking in confidence. They are secure, they know who they are, and they aren’t taking any crap from any men hiding behind a wall.
One woman, Amber, has a 7-year-old daughter at home. While I’m usually firmly against single parents going on this show (guys, come on), I have to admit — Amber is bona fide. She seems incredibly genuine and lovely, and talks openly about how she’s weird and a little offbeat and a little messy. She makes no secret of being “bad” with money or of what she wants out of life, and that kind of attitude is prevalent with all the women.
They are already doing the work on themselves before they even start talking to these men. They’ve literally turned themselves into their very own best versions so that they can find The One without any hesitation or mess.
The same… can not be said of the men.
Another contestant, Tyler, knows that the man she’s interested in has another “top” choice. This man spends most of his dates with her going on and on about how much he likes her, complimenting her left and right.
“He’s gushing about how great I am,” she says back in the suite with the other women. “I know that. So what are you going to do about it?”
Because of course he can’t make a decision or fire anything up just yet. He’s got to feel out his options, he’s got to go on more dates, he’s got to keep whining about how he doesn’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings… while actively hurting everybody’s feelings.
Another woman, Emma, spends one of the pods in blind date hell as she shares a super traumatic and deep story about herself, only to have the guy on the other side quickly shift into asking her how she lost her virginity. Emma was vulnerable and open and diving into something she wasn’t quite ready to share — so that she could feel close to this person — and he instead accuses her of not giving him a good enough story about her first kiss or first sexual encounter.
It’s honestly exhausting.
So far, some of the couples look promising, but Love is Blind isn’t just an experiment about finding love without knowing if you’re physically attracted to someone; it’s an unintentional experiment to see just how much work women are having to do. These women have to reassure the men, who are being d*cks, that their feelings are valid. These women have to end relationships that these men simply won’t come out and speak the truth about — and then these women have to listen to these men dole out a million compliments to assuage their own guilt.
The women of Love is Blind have to carry all of it — their own feelings, plus the man’s feelings — and try and make sense of everything.
The women of Love is Blind don’t need to be asked what they bring to the table — they’re already carrying the damn thing on their backs.
Again, I have high hopes for some of the relationships forming in this season of Love is Blind. Ohio looks like a fairly good state stocked with wholesome, normal people.
But I truly was not expecting to see just how much work these women have to do to find a “partnership.” It’s like working a group project: one of them has to do most of the work and the other gets to have sex with a hot woman on a tropical vacation in 10 days.
