Let’s be real: pregnancy is 40 weeks long. That’s technically longer than nine months, which feels like a cruel joke played by Mother Nature. During those 280-ish days, your brain becomes a playground for weird questions, deep-seated concerns, and intrusive thoughts that range from, “Is that a contraction?” to “Will I ever see my toes again?”
The problem? Polling your mom friends usually just leaves you more confused. One friend says her morning sickness lasted 10 minutes, while another may have puked right up to her due date. Since no two pregnancies are the same, your BFF’s best advice might not apply to your current situation. From hands that look like overstuffed sausages to the frequency of your bowel movements, your body is doing some weird stuff right now. That’s why having a healthcare team that actually listens — and doesn’t judge — is a total lifesaver.
That’s where the experts at Inova come in. As the leading nonprofit healthcare provider for Northern Virginia and the D.C. area, they aren’t just there to measure your bump. Their goal is to help you make informed decisions about your body and your baby.
Stop hesitating over that embarrassing question or the guilt from that second cup of coffee. Here are five things it’s totally OK to tell your doctor, even if you’re blushing.
1. “I’m terrified of giving birth.”
Giving birth is technically natural, but that doesn’t make it any less scary. Under Inova’s wing, you can also work with a Certified Nurse Midwife (CNM), a superhero Advanced Practice Nurse dedicated to your entire journey. These midwives are part of the hospital-based care team, offering a more personalized, often lower-intervention approach while still providing immediate access to OB-GYNs and specialists if needed. And if that’s a path you’re considering, you can get connected early: many patients are able to schedule a pregnancy confirmation appointment with a midwife within about 72 hours of reaching out — sometimes even as soon as the next day — so your care plan can start taking shape right away. Inova also welcomes doulas in the delivery room, which have been shown to increase physical and emotional comfort for laboring mothers.
This power combination, along with Inova’s reputation as a regional leader in childbirth care, can help you feel less alone, get more questions answered, and make the birthing process feel less scary.
2. “I don’t think I’m bonding with this pregnancy.”
Not feeling “the spark” with your unborn baby makes you feel like a bad mom before you’ve even given birth. It’s okay — and you should say it out loud (to your doctor).
“I usually say, ‘If it crossed your mind, it’s worth saying out loud’,” says Jessica Hughes Day, MSN, APRN, CNM, a certified nurse midwife who delivers at Inova Fairfax Hospital. With Inova delivering 62% of the region’s babies, she assures us, “There’s very little in pregnancy that we haven’t heard before.”
In addition to personalized prenatal care, Inova provides mental health screenings and counseling, so you don’t have to navigate these negative thoughts alone.
3. “I drank more coffee than I should have last week.”
The pregnancy rulebook is exhausting. If you “slip” on a habit or worry you’ve harmed your baby, just be honest. Empathetic, compassionate doctors and nurses are a big reason why three Inova hospitals (Inova Alexandria, Inova Fair Oaks and Inova Loudoun hospitals) were named as 2026 high performing hospitals for maternity care. Not to mention, Inova Fair Oaks has been recognized as high performing for maternity care for five consecutive years.
“Even things that may feel small or embarrassing can be clinically important,” Day explains. “Those details help us connect the dots early and tailor care in a way that’s safer and more personalized. But just as importantly, honesty builds relationships, and that’s where the best care happens.”
4. “What if I change my mind about my choices?”
Pregnancy involves a lot of decision making, and not all of it is predictable, Day says. You’re allowed to change your mind.
“Patients need to trust that their provider is not only clinically skilled, but also is listening, respecting their values and advocating for them,” Day says. “From my perspective, trust is built through consistency and kindness — showing up, being honest, involving patients in decisions, and being transparent when plans need to change.”
5. “I’m worried about postpartum depression.”
We’re convinced ‘the pregnancy glow’ is a myth (it’s more likely sweat and anxiety). If you feel nervous about negative thoughts postpartum, it’s OK. You don’t need to carry these feelings around alone or feel embarrassed about them, Day says.
“We want to know what’s really going on so we can support you fully,” Day says. “You don’t need to filter yourself in the exam room. In fact, the questions people hesitate to ask are often the ones that matter most, and are the ones your provider appreciates answering.”
By being fully transparent, your healthcare team can ensure you have a safety net ready the second you head home.
To learn more about Inova and their maternal services, please visit inova.org.
