Reading Clutch was part of a friendship experiment. My college besties thought it would be a fun group read. Many of us are in book clubs that are separate from our college friend group. While we are (mostly) all readers and happily share books when we meet, our reviews and reading lives are largely asynchronous.
Since this book tackled the bonds of friendship, we thought: Why not?
I believe three of the seven of us have finished it at this point, and I have notes.
And I have spoilers.
The Book’s Structure
The book centers around three trips and five women.
We meet the crew as they stand at the beginning of a new decade—they are all turning 40. Forty is a decade when things get more intense. Work and family demands are at their peak, and these women are not thriving. The three moms in the group are pretty middling parents—and it’s not because they are killing it in their careers. These working professionals seem to view their kiddos as inconvenient accessories. There are scant moments of joyful parenting, and these women just seem to be living with regret after regret (an alternate title for the book?).
Scattered across the country, the women keep in touch via text and the occasional girls’ trip. The first trip is a regular old girls-behaving-badly weekend. Think of the trio from The White Lotus (the Thailand season), and you’ll get the vibe. They are competitive and withholding. I don’t think anyone comes away from the novel’s kickoff weekend feeling particularly refreshed or reconnected—especially the reader.
The next gathering is a funeral. And now the friendship starts to thaw. The women make time for a trip that’s packed with meaning and true connection. I guess death will do that to you.
Then comes the final trip. And another chance for the author to spell out, loud and clear, how she feels about men. In the last pages, we are left with the core group of women picking up the pieces and finally showing up for one another. Why does it take hundreds of pages to get there? I’m not sure, I’ll have to ask the author Emily Nemens.
The Husbands Suck
I’m at a point in my life and my marriage where I need to focus on the good parts. Now 22 years in, there are plenty of annoying things about both of us. Dwelling on them doesn’t serve anyone. Well, at least anyone who wants to stay married.
This crew of husbands is exceptionally deceitful and dreary.
The men in this book aren’t just letting these women down; they’re holding them back from greatness and goodness. And some of them are criminals. Let me get this little spoiler off my chest.
If my husband ever hurt a living creature the way one of the husbands hurts the corgis in this book, it would be a marriage-ender. Non-negotiable. I almost had to abandon the book at that point. Being so close to the end, I soldiered on.
But They Have Each Other
Most of the women aren’t likable. In the early chapters, we have to trust that they are lovable. They seem shallow and petty—not the type of women I’d enjoy spending time with. It takes the proverbial fan getting hit for the true colors of the friendship to show.
Ultimately, I’m not sure it’s worth the effort to slog through.
Look, I get it. Books like The Five-Star Weekend are fluffy. That’s not what real friendship is like. Life is messier and can’t be fixed over a weekend. But this can’t be the only alternative. Let me attest that decades-long friendships can be messy, but they are also much more fun than they’re painted here.
Life is short. We only get to read so many books in our lives. This one didn’t lift my spirits, engage me intellectually, or spark any creative appreciation. It’s well written, but jeez—use your powers for good.
Get It on Amazon (If You Really Want To)
Final Thoughts
Clutch is a well-written but relentlessly bleak examination of female friendship, marriage, and midlife disappointment. While the novel ultimately lands on the importance of showing up for the women who matter most, it takes a long and often unpleasant road to get there. Get It on Amazon (If You Really Want To)
One-line takeaway: Clutch argues that friendship can save us, but first it makes everyone miserable.
For fans of: The White Lotus, Big Little Lies, complicated female friendships, literary fiction about midlife, and readers who don’t mind unlikeable characters.
Where I read it: At home on our roofdeck, alongside text messages from my college friends as we worked our way through this accidental friendship experiment together.
Try this novel about better friends (but warning it’s sad)
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